The thing about glitter is if you get it on you, be prepared to have it on you forever. Glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.
Demetri Martin

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Shaking my way out of the funks

Sorta shaking my way out of the funks after a bad week or so - tear your hair out, kill everyone around you, Medusa brainy buzz phenomenon.  Followed by a miserable bladder infection.  Complete with twice a day abx the size of my thumb.

You're right - too much information. 
Forgive me.  I'm not perfect and Christmas is 10 days away.  I'm under pressure!

But we've all been there.  Right??

Of course, I blame the whole close to the edge - avoiding eye contact - borderline psychotic introversion on the GPK comic that I found during my Facebook induced 80's cartoon flashback that I shared  here and here

You're right - that was better left forgotten.  We've all seen it and suffered enough.

Does anyone watch 30 Rock?  I laughed when Avery told Jack that she only has her period once a year, an occasion for which she holds a standing reservation at a fenced-in "retreat" in the Adirondacks.  Now I'm thinking she's a freaking genius.  If only I had her money...  I'll have to work on that.  As for Jenna's habit of soaking her tampons in vodka - I'm saving that little treat for the holiday festivities yet to come.

Maybe laughter is the best medicine. 
Let's all laugh a little and fell less crazy, shall we?

30 Rock Laughs
1. Jenna:  You should go to my Doctor.  He's gay, but not when he's drunk.

2. Tracy: Sure, I Google myself all the time. Like when Angie's not in the mood or I'm alone in a hotel.

3. Tracy: Well I'm sorry Sean, and child actor whose name I can't remember. You haven't walked in my shoes! All my life I've tried to forget the things I've seen: I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs! I watched a prostitute stab a clown! Our basketball hoop was a ribcage! A guy in dreds electrocuted my fish! a crackhead breast-feeding a rat! A homeless man cooking a Hot Pocket on a third rail of the G train! The G train, Nermal!

4.Tracy: Recently I realized I have a hole in my heart. And not the one I got from eating batteries.
5. Tracy: I feel like you're not telling me something, Jack. Lemme guess. You bought a sidecar for your motorcycle and your dog won't stay in it.

6. Tracy: Heavy is the head that eats the crayons.

7. Tracy: So here's some advice I wish I would have got when I was your age... Live every week, like it's shark week.

8. Jack: Ambition is the willingness to kill the things you love and eat them in order to stay alive. Haven't you ever read my throw pillow?

9. Paul: I'm saying, adopting a dog so it can watch us make love and then returning it, claiming that it bit our imaginary child, is everything that I need, but if that's not enough for you tell me now.

10. Liz: Trying on jeans is my favorite thing. Maybe later I can get a pap smear from an old male doctor.

11. Verna: It's at a fancy restaurant, so wear something nice, like a pair of white jeans and a Dan Marino jersey

12. Liz: You can't force the fate, you just have to let it wash over you like a spray tan that won't take because your skin is too oily.

13. Jenna Maroney: Oh, I can play dead. I watched my whole church group get eaten by a bear.

14. Liz: Do I look okay?
      Cerie: That’s exactly how you look

15. Jack: You can't delude yourself into thinking you can combine them into one perfect woman, like a Smore you can take a shower with

16. Liz: I will spend half the day in twilight sleep and then I will go home to watch the Lifetime movie 'My Stepson Is My Cyber-Husband.'
     Jack: That's inspired. You truly are the Picasso of loneliness.

I love quotations.  And I love you, 30 Rock.
And I feel better now.

1 comment:

Debra She Who Seeks said...

"Oh, I can play dead. I watched my whole church group get eaten by a bear." Hahahahahahaha! Although that would probably be less funny in real life. However -- not the point!


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