The thing about glitter is if you get it on you, be prepared to have it on you forever. Glitter is the herpes of craft supplies.
Demetri Martin

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Inconsequential Mutterings of an Overly Inquisitive Mind

Time for some inconsequential discussion.  I know, you've been waiting for it.  Probably been expecting it.  Perhaps seen it coming.  Probably not, though - these erratic tendencies of mine are very fly by the seat of their pants, even though peculiarities generally go pant-less.

There - how's that for an intro?  Got your attention??

I have a very important item of contemplation for you and yours as the result of a recent finding at me and mine's dinner table this past week.

Is there more than one way to eat corn on the cob? 

If you are like me, this is not something you've ever thought about (yes, there are actually a few things that I haven't thought about before - surprising, I know, with my tendency towards idle wonderings...) 

I mean, there is a standard way to eat corn on the cob, is there not?  I am of the typewriter-approach variety of cob nibblers.  Left to right and repeat.  I have been in the presence of people in the past who have walked the fine line between sanity and insanity by varying this method into a zigzag typewriter fashion (left to right, right to left, and repeat). 

I realize that this variation in corn eating style may be a tad bit mind blowing.  So brace yourself.
Shocking though it may seem, you are about to hear of another way to eat corn from the cob.  The brace yourself part was because this is about to take a very long winded turn you may not have been expecting, knowing my usual to-the-point writing style.

My husband likes the little bitty shriveled up kernels of corn that grow on the top of the cob.  He likes them so much, in fact, that he saves them for the end.  Consequently, he has adapted his corn on the cob eating style so as to preserve these tender goodies until such a time as they can be wholeheartedly enjoyed - once the rest of the corn has been dealt with.

Accordingly, My Sweetest eats his corn in a spiraling ring sort of fashion. 

He begins at the bottom end of the cob (the end where you have to break off the piece of stalk after shucking the corn) and works around the cob until he has come full cirle and a ring of corn has been chewed from the cob.  He then realigns the cob so as to begin a new ring adjacent to the first.  He then eats around the cob again, repeating this process until he has eaten all the way up to the itty bitty guys at the top of the cob. 

It is at this point that he releases himself from his restrictive self-control and enjoys his favorite part of the cob.

Is this evolution in the works?  Indication of superior frontal cortex processing?  Will we all be doing this 500 years from now?

If you are like me and eat your corn in the evolutionarily-significant-right-now fashion of side to side typewriter chomping, then you can see where I am coming from.

If, like my husband, you eat your corn this way, good for you.  It's important to be unique in some way, and if you are willing to dispense your limited capacity for originality on your corn on the cob eating style then power to you. 

Cause really, being able to recite the alphabet via bodily function sound effects is way overdone.

As promised, inconsequential mutterings of an overly inquisitive mind.
You were warned... 

So why not jump into my nightmare?

What is your corn on the cob eating style??


Debra She Who Seeks said...

I have used both methods. Guess that makes me Bi-cobual or something, eh?

Andrea on Third Street said...

That's just messed up. Good thing I didn't know of this method prior to writing this post, then it would have been really long and silly ;)

Pat said...

I love sweet corn but I loathe getting it stuck in my teeth. I cut it off the cob with a sharp knife so I can harvest every bit and put it in a bowl to eat with a spoon. Might be cheating, but it's oh soooo good.

Andrea on Third Street said...

I admit: I've used this technique. However, I've reserved it for times when I've assisted small toddlers and the elderly with no front teeth in preparing their meals. Whatever works - corn is too good to miss out on, right?


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